Marcus Ross: From Pain and Divorce to Self-Discovery and Entrepreneurship with Purpose

Speaker 1

00:00

 In this episode of the form adversity. To abundance podcast, we chat with Marcus Ross. Who is in, Melbourne Australia? Which is where my teammate Sandra is from. But Marcus is now a counselor and has gone through a lot of painful things in his life including relationship issues, an unexpected parent death, and then two divorces unfortunately. And it's interesting to see the difference in between the two Horses as far as Marcus has reflection on them and how much more ownership he took of the problems with his second marriage. So, we dive into that, we dive into entrepreneurship and, you know, leaving a job that he had for 20 years to create his own business. And he's got, unfortunately, a lot of credibility with regard to navigating adversity, and getting to an Abundance mindset. You know, he talks a lot about modifying bad behaviors and talks a lot about communication being critical. And really his business is geared toward men. Mostly going through men going through hard times, is what it sounds like, but that doesn't mean that there's not something in this episode for everyone. He's very relatable, very down to earth, and he does open up quite a bit about again. Of painful things he's been through in his life that unfortunately. A lot of people can probably relate to, so he's still on his know, I guess, Financial abundance Journey, but I think you will find this episode beneficial. Inspiring stories of real people. Overcoming incredible odds to live life to the fullest.

Speaker 2

02:03

 We are all guaranteed to face. Hardships.

Speaker 1

02:05

 How will we handle the adversity? Join us to be moved by every day, people who have turned poverty into prosperity and weakness into wealth Be Inspired as these relatable Heroes, get vulnerable.

Speaker 2

02:17

 And former.

Speaker 1

02:18

 Counterintelligence investigator Jamie Bateman puts his interviewing skills to the test, restore your faith in humanity as you. It's true. Cinderella's stories of average people turning surreal struggle and deep despair into booming, businesses and financial Fortune. Take ownership of the life. You are destined to live and turn your adversity into abundance. Welcome everybody to another episode of the form adversity to abundance podcast. I am your host Jamie Bateman, and I am excited today to have a special guest on with us. Marcus Ross of, he's the phone founder and owner, excuse me of ready to heal counseling, and he's in Melbourne, Australia Marcus. How are you doing.

Speaker 2

03:08

 Today? Hey, good. Thanks, Jamie. How are you.

Speaker 1

03:12

 Doing? Well, sun is shining here. I guess. What time is it.

Speaker 2

03:19

 There? Today out for I am.

Speaker 1

03:23

 Okay. Hey you pick this time?

Speaker 2

03:29

 I am an early riser.

Speaker 1

03:31

 There you go. Okay. I bet we're maybe going to touch on that. So Marcus we met on Facebook and you know what, you have told me about your story was very moving and I thought that would make a fantastic guest for our show, and we just were Speaking before we hit record about the intent of the show, which is to inspire people who are going through a hard time, or, you know, all of us will face adversity. And, and the intent of the show is to talk to Everyday people who have faced adversity, right? And to determine kind of analyze, you know, how that went, and how you handle that, and, and pull out some lessons from there. So, for the listeners, Who are unfamiliar with you. Let us dive into kind of who you are today and what you have going on right now.

Speaker 2

04:31

 Yeah, sure sorry. Yes I am day. As you mentioned I am a fan of it. I don't know if I am ready to heal counseling and I started this business only last year only just last year actually I started my journey on the counseling pathway back in 2020 to do my training and so forth. And a big part of that is Wanting to have a Passion to help other people when they might be going through tough times themselves. Got it. And in my business, currently, I work predominantly with me. Predominantly around life, transitions of any kind, any major life transitions, they may be going through, which does include things like separations and divorces and it's all it really about. Empowering men towards their best lives. Yeah, I feel like I personally have a connection to that being on the journey that I have been on. And now I would like to use the experiences and the pain. I guess that I felt at that time. Obviously, yeah, that was obviously a difficult time of my life, but like, to use that to help tale by others, who may be going through a similar situation. And I feel Like, that's really positive. That's a really positive thing. Yeah. Yeah. And in, in the practice that I currently have, yeah, we use a user range of techniques EBT act and mindfulness therapies. As I said, just To, we can get stuck in that position. Myself back in early 2020. I was feeling. Unfulfilled frustrated and lost at that time. I didn't really know. Yeah. Where to go. I think a lot of men, you know, find themselves in that similar situation. Yeah. Especially when you know they're in a family environment and you know they're going through a separation and there's a lot of dangers involved. And adjustments documents that need to be. That need to be made. Sure. And yes, it's a difficult time of transition, I guess. Yeah. And just to be able to find your purpose and to be able to move forwards. I think is really important in that, in that situation. Yeah, yeah. So that's where I am today.

Speaker 1

07:52

 Day got it. Yeah, though it's, I mean, unfortunately, I think a lot of men can probably relate to what you're talking about and so if you would, let us back up a little bit and kind of set the stage for how you got to early 2020. You know, what was your? And it doesn't need to start from your birth, but you can back up to as far as you want to just set the stage set the concept context for You know what, what did your life look like, you know, 10, 15 years ago, leading up to.

Speaker 2

08:27

 2020? Yeah. Well, I might actually go back a little bit further than that. Actually, because I feel like there is a couple of terms of defining type of minor moments in my life, that did have an impact and end up ultimately end up in me being in that position that I spoke about before, where I was just sort of feeling unfulfilled and little bit stuck. I guess you could say with that. not having not been clear on that purpose in life, so I guess, First seeing mentioned. So I grew up on a family farm in the country, and we had liked we had sheep and cattle and propping cropping Farm only and I it was just me and my older sister and was obviously great. Yeah the space to run around and explore and everything like that. So it was obviously really great experience growing up in that location. But yeah, I guess growing up something that does stick out and come to mind. I guess is like, I used to go out and like all, I my dad around a lot of doing Jobs and different things around the farm just sort of helping out. And I do remember like I did have a really good relationship with my parents and with my dad and Yeah, we had a good Bond, and he would on thing I do, remember, he got me involved in junior football from a very young age, sport called a FL, which I am not sure how much, you know, about the sport in over there. But, but yeah, it's quite a, but athletic and everything like that. And for us, you.

Speaker 1

10:55

 Ask your time. Soccer.

Speaker 2

10:57

 Right. No. It's, it's an oval. It's an oval ball. Okay? And.

Speaker 1

11:04

 There's a lot of stress. This is Australian football.

Speaker 2

11:07

 Is it? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. There's a lot of jumping marking and okay. It's very athletic. I don't think there's a lot of it Char. There's a lot of jarring. Yeah, over there. But uh anyway, is.

Speaker 1

11:21

 This, is this like rugby? Where is it different from.

Speaker 2

11:24

 That different? Yeah.

Speaker 1

11:26

 Yeah. We can have a side. Conversation.

Speaker 2

11:28

 Later. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. That's probably another pot. But yeah, so he got me involved in that which I am very thankful for and obviously like he was involved heavily in the club into volunteer roles and different things like that. And anyway, you know, that was great experience. I think for me and you know, development and everything. Big, and, and big part of my life growing up was, I remember, you know, jumping in the vehicle and my dad taking me to every Saturday morning, but that taking me to Sport and, and doing that. So yeah, obviously want to read to integrate that, you know, in general water Great Dot or and you know, had a did have a close bond with both my parents. Don't you having said that back when I was Six years old, I can distinctly remember, you know, I would be helping my dad outside on the farm and unfortunately wasn't the best at handling his emotions. So you know, he'd be doing a job and get frustrated with something, and he sort of curse to himself and do the odd for the odd tool around and I guess age I didn't really know like what, what make of that. So that was just one. Experience that I think was actually, you know, really important in. Where I ended up being before I went on my went through my transformation. I guess you could say and affected. Yeah, like affected things later on for me. So yeah.

Speaker 1

13:28

 Do not want to pray too much and it's not the intent of the show, but just we're talking about physical abuse as that.

Speaker 2

13:39

 No, they're not physical with more just It wasn't actually, I wasn't actually aimed at 30. I am at your face. Just how.

Speaker 1

13:51

 Early you were.

Speaker 2

13:52

 Watching. It was just yeah it was just more how he held himself, got on got it just got frustrated, you know, quite easily. So, yeah. It was just more about. Yeah. Like emotional, emotional control, I guess.

Speaker 1

14:06

 Rather. That's your, that's your model for how to.

Speaker 2

14:09

 Yeah, that sort of model, right? Yeah, that's what I saw. I will get it. And now Being blocked, my parents were quite had quite strong conversations at times. You know which I was always present and so. So yeah, nothing physical, or such was this that You know that strong verbal conflict which you know looking back. Probably did it influence your thoughts myself and you know how I communicate it and yeah understand don't with the people around me.

Speaker 1

14:54

 Right + 6 is you know, pretty.

Speaker 2

14:57

 Young?

Speaker 1

14:58

 So yeah. It's not like you're 16 or 26 in. Yeah I understand now you know, adults do. Always get along, you know. But yeah, that's your very impressionable and vulnerable, you know, at that point. So okay, so then and I, and I don't, I don't mean to gloss over things, you know, I do want to make sure we cover as much as we can, so, and then fast-forward a little bit for us, if you would.

Speaker 2

15:29

 Yeah. So Yes, I went through, I up until the age of 17, I was on the holes on the farm and obviously doing my education and helping out with bits and pieces. And then, yeah, when I was 17 started a role in automotive industry, actually like Parts apart to retail type role, and I was predominantly in that. Korea for Soto wall, over 20 years, over 20 years in school until more recently, That year to put it all so hard to condense it all down. But yeah. But yeah, like I was back in Like I have been, I have been married twice. So Montfort the first time that I was married, we have had a to my previous relationship. I had a, we had a son, had a son together, he's now 10 years old. So and 2012 with the other, another defining moment for me that I can think of is Back in 2011, which was actually the year. Yeah, like that my son was born and unfortunately in early 2011, we lost my dad, you know, shock car vehicle accident. So yeah, that was difficult thing for us. All. I was the only male in the family that was sort of left because there was just As far as immediate family liked it my mom and my sister and myself were you know we're the ones with the ones left behind. So yeah and obviously being the fact that it was a shock you know we weren't prepared at all. Yeah it like that was really difficult and you know that I am also living a disc for my dad. So you know that bought up a lot of Your feelings, you know, of regret and different things, you know about? Yeah, it's been in more time with him. I guess towards the end of, you know, towards the end of years times, but we never do know. You never do know, how long, how long any of us have though? That's where, you know, that's brought a lot of gratitude to me. Now, to be very, you know, thankful for all of this, like I am that we do have yeah, you know, with our Done with our family members. So yeah. I feel like that was pointing moment for me and I didn't really talk about it or deal with it at the time. I think for memory I had a couple of counseling sessions but it didn't really even touch the surface of what you know, what was there? Like the feelings that I felt and Really addressing the, you know, the grief involved. And so it just sort of ignored it and swept it under the carpet thinking that, you know, that was the right thing to do. And, you know, I just needed to keep on going because, you know, I am a man, and we don't talk. We don't talk about this. We don't talk about this stuff. So, Yeah. So that was.

Speaker 1

19:19

 Most specially if you know about how old were you then if you don't mind me asking but in 2011?

Speaker 2

19:28

 yeah some 40 now. So yeah would have been like yeah 2020s. Yeah.

Speaker 1

19:33

 Well I just it doesn't I am just trying to get some context more content but so yeah, I mean and again if you're I think a lot of men can relate to that, you know, it's just you can end up in and I think we're going to get into this but especially once you have a family and a job and it's very easy to get isolated and then culturally, we're not programmed or, you know, we're just not open in general, to always sharing emotional things and, you know, as you very well know, so, It totally makes total sense, you know, from my standpoint. I mean, I think a lot of men can relate to that, but a lot of people can relate to that. So, and then, so at that point you were still married with in your first marriage, right?

Speaker 2

20:29

 Yeah. So actually, what, yeah, what, unfortunately lost that in so earlier in 2012, March 19, 2011, in my son was born in October 2011, so Now is a little bit sad that. Yeah, that might bad. Be to me a son. They just, they just missed each other but you know, they hopefully you know, asked on some values and things you know, from my dad, to my son. So yeah, 2011 was pretty big.

Speaker 1

21:09

 Time actually. Yeah. And then.

Speaker 2

21:13

 I believe, my son was only around without leave am one unfortunately, when, like, when we separated when we separate, but when I separated from his mother, yeah, so that was like, within that I guess it's like within that sort of 12 18 month period. There was a lot of stuff happen. Yeah. I like obviously losing bad son being born and, you know, not that long after, you know, the family separation. Oh, so yeah, a lot of stuff having me through that stress within that period after. So that was definitely looking back. That was obviously. Yeah, that was obviously difficult time and Adjusting to all the changes and you know, moving forward. Yeah, so and then I guess, Korea was I was still as I said before, I was in the retail management really until more tools of 2020, when I started studying the other studying counseling. And yeah, I think and my I met my second. My second wife in around 2016 had quite a period of time. Well, just pull more so concentrating on. Yeah, I am building a building. Good relationship with Mossad and, you know, my Korea and everything else. So also more focused on those things rather than necessarily, you know, looking for love or looking for partner or anything like that, right? That in yeah, 2016 met my second wife, Wife. And then later, we had a daughter together, and she's now three years old. And then I think what I think the thing is the feel like from the first marriage, I didn't really take anything from it. I as far as learnings, I think from my first marriage as Maybe I am not the only hopeful. I am not the only person that's done this but I think from my first marriage, I just sort of wrote that off as the other person. You know the.

Speaker 1

23:52

 Other person who was heard other persons.

Speaker 2

23:54

 That it's their fault. Yeah that's right. And I didn't really take ownership for the things that I you know that I could have done better right? And I think so that was obviously an issue because Yeah, I didn't take those learnings and I feel like, yeah, I feel like both of my, you know, both of my marriages, I could have been much better, you know, much better person is better. Dad Emily you know person in the family role model. I yeah unfortunately I had some negative patterns around, you know controlling my emotions in the fact that I think because some of those previous experiences that I had seen I was yeah, I was not the best at controlling my emotions and I sort of frustrated or Teasley and I think in the end that sort of culminated in, you know, just being a being bitten of angry being bitten of an angry person, really, probably not, not being very approachable to others, including, you know, including my family. And that's, you know, that's definitely not, you know, not where I wanted not well, wanted to be. But obviously wanted to be approachable and know that, you know, my kids will comfortable in coming to Me about different things. And you know that my partner felt like, you know, I felt like they could talk about different things. So yeah, that was.

Speaker 1

25:53

 Yeah.

Speaker 2

25:54

 That was not a good, not a good outcome and You know, I think what happened once like early 2020. Got like when I experience our second like I second my second patient that was defining moment, I Wake up cold, that was sort of. Basically, just There was a lot of shock for me because I wasn't, I wasn't really fully aware of the situation that was, you know, it was as bad as it was and so because of that was very, it was big. It was a big shock to the system, but I think more than anything. It was just a big wake-up call for me. Where I was just at that point, I was so forced to reassess everything in my life, where I, where I actually was in my life and maybe Who I wanted to be and like, what sort of values, what sort of values I wanted to show for me as a person and yeah, it was that was really just over process, really of, of finding myself. So I think over the next sort of two to three months, I just done a lot of, a lot of soul-searching. My, you know, as I mentioned before I was, I was unfulfilled. I was, I was not happy. And I was just frustrated with where my life was at. And I think it just took that it's unfortunately it took the event of the separation to actually wake up and, you know, start to actually recess some of these things about that I wasn't, you know, I wasn't in a good place and that was sort of the start of it, I guess then. Reassessing what actually wanted and then I had a background in retail management, like, for over 20 years, spoken, about branching out and doing something different, but I have never actually pulled the trigger and take any action on it. Yeah, I would look into a few different things at different stages but just procrastinated and Right done. Yeah.

Speaker 1

28:51

 Sorry to cut you off. I definitely want to get into that mindset and it because you definitely are, you know. I don't want this to be all. I will — it's you. I can tell you have a lot of passion for what you're doing now, and so I definitely want to get to that. Yeah. So just and just to be clear. So you are divorced now, is that right? Yes. Okay I just wanted to because you said Second separation. I just want to be clear so and I mean, yeah, one of the things that went through my mind was, I was just listening to another podcast where the guy was talking about. Reflect reflexive thinking versus reflective thinking and you know how just in general in the US or, you know, in the west I would say, in general in the world. Today we tend to just have reflexive thinking, we don't, we don't even really think we just, we just consume and just scroll on our phones and go to work and, you know, and that's normal. I mean, that's not that everyone should be, you know, a monk or something. But We, you know, you do have to live the day-to-day and have reflux of thinking, but we don't ever take the time to have this reflective thinking that you took several months to do and unfortunately some real pain as what, what led to that and was a big part of that, I imagine, right? But it's for me, I am hoping that the listener can draw out that it's really important to take that time create that space. However, that comes about, you know, whatever your that situation looks like for each person, but whether that's daily weekly, you know, whatever. But take that space to kind of evaluate who you are, and who you want to be. And obviously, that's what you, what you focus on for other people now. So, And so, then talk to us about that, the professional transition that you made, and how? Because a lot of our listeners are entrepreneurs or want to be entrepreneurs or, you know, they have a side hustle or their investors, you know, who run a small business in some way, shape, or form. So, You know, of course, not everyone is going through the exact same situation as you, but what was it? You know, mentally. What was your mindset at that time, where you, how are you? How did, you know it was the right time to, you know, make that professional transition and make the leap to be an entrepreneur?

Speaker 2

31:37

 Yeah. Think at that time, it was a couple of questions that I ask myself and ask myself. Was I think I touched on before? Who? Who do I want to do? I want to be like as far as what do I want to be weird or want to be known for us person, but they will use everything like that. What's important? And another thing was like where did I want to be in five years.

Speaker 1

32:06

 Time?

Speaker 2

32:07

 And that was sort of the main two questions that I ask myself clear on what my purpose actually was. And we're I wanted to because I didn't have that Clarity.

Speaker 1

32:20

 So let us so what were the answers?

Speaker 2

32:22

 Just died. But what I found is I knew that I wanted to do something. Help other people, and I knew that. Yeah, wanted to use. I wanted to do something where I could use my experiences and the pain that I felt who hopefully help other men who might run was journey to me. I am like you tell me two years ago just over two years ago so that was my main purpose and then it was just a matter of locking in what particular area that I you know, they don't want it to work in and counseling is something that just felt right to me because it was an opportunity for me to Give back I guess you could say and you know hopefully use my wisdom and my experience over my life to hopefully you know help and God. Help them guide other men in.

Speaker 1

33:40

 Question. So you are, I mean, Generally speaking, at least in the u.s. Divorce is pretty expensive. And I don't mean to laugh about it but it's just you know, it's a fact, right? And so how were you able to kind of get in the right mindset about your financial situation? Because that's you already had a lot of transition going on, so I could see a lot of people in the same position or Similar position wanting as much stability as possible and not wanting to change other variables in their life. Such as I mean, starting a new, a new Venture. That's a lot in and of itself. So how did you navigate those Waters?

Speaker 2

34:28

 Mentally? Yeah. Well what do I because it was something that I was there all passionate about. I didn't think I really thought about the financial side of it too much but um I just new that, you know, the knew that I had to make it happen somehow but I started the business on a part-time basis around my other full-time retail management job. So that I guess gave me the basis only good basis, you know where I could, you know, I still had some funds and the income, you know, to be able to start.

Speaker 1

35:14

 Yeah, that's it. I mean, hands.

Speaker 2

35:17

 On that basis.

Speaker 1

35:18

 Got it. I personally went part-time at my job in 2015 and it's been doing part-time. Real estate and mortgage note investing since before that. And so and then eventually just quit my job this year. But the reason I say that is it, that was seven years of part-time and part-time, right? And it just I think people get so wrapped up in want to be an entrepreneur and you now and then you know go and quit their job and realize it's a lot of work and it's not always You know what? It's cracked up to be, but it sounds like your mindset was not really about. It was just bigger than that. It was you needed to serve your purpose. Now was to serve others. It sounds like so you weren't. So the rest was going to figure itself out. It's kind of what?

Speaker 2

36:18

 Yeah, and I think it was gone back to my wife as well because I don't know why I was like Kids because added bonus. I guess I like from doing this type of work and, and obviously being in my own business. Although, although as you would know, there's a lot of, a lot of work involved in getting that up off the ground. Yeah. Was that, you know, I can have that little flexibility around my schedule. So because I always, I found myself coming back to that. That reason that was the driving force which was that I want to spend more time, more time quality time with my kids, right? So that's what that's been about, but did it just to clarify to? Yeah, it does. Take time to build a business, of course. And, you know, it's been growing steadily. And but currently you know, still do dumb, some other work, you know, to compliment that also but yeah, like it's been really good journey and you know, I am happy with where things are heading. I think they're heading in a good direction to the point where hopefully I can get to the point that you got to where I will be, you know, stepping Full 100% all time by the end of this year. It's the adult thanks, but yeah. Generally in business, you know, quite often to build up the clientele, everything like that, you know, it does take a bit of a period bit of period of.

Speaker 1

38:16

 Time. I think three years is kind of what I hear, you know. And of course varies wildly based on what industry you're in and What your approach is and everything, but so, you're, you're still within that three years. So, yeah, people, it's just, it takes a lot of work and I do have, you know, more control of my schedule. Now, I can do things, you know, in the middle of the day, but that doesn't mean it's. That doesn't mean I am not working at odd hours, I mean, you're doing a podcast of for am so there's You obviously still are putting in some work for sure but so, just looking back at it. I guess. You know, anything, we talked about already, I still have other questions to run through, but what would you say are some of the biggest takeaways? You know, it could be how you were able to look at your second marriage and you it sounds like you were able to Tell me when words are mounted, but you were able to kind of take ownership of your role in that more so than the first one is that fair to say? Yeah.

Speaker 2

39:36

 Definitely once. Yeah. I was able to learn and grow a lot from that experience and understanding that just getting a better awareness of how I was you know interacting with the people around me because back at my life back of my low point, you know, like All of my relationship we're not God, wasn't communicating well with others. And You know, there was a lot of stuff going on at that time do she was in the situation to like financially was not good you know there was a range of things and all came back to my own behavior. And some of the poor decisions or decisions that I have made in the past, that was just getting that realization. And that self-awareness of, you know some of those poor decisions and behaviors had actually led to me being where I was and if I can start making things better, yeah decisions. Then you know, things can be better, right? I just, I think at that point at my lowest point, I just new that something had to change because If I kept down the path, I was going, I was just, you know, nothing was going to get better.

Speaker 1

41:18

 Yeah, I mean I think in as much as that sounds and you know it was very painful to go through there is hope in that as well. So in other words if you hadn't come to that realization then there's no hope in changing things like you just said. So to me, that is liberating in a sense as Home, because then you now have more control of your future. And so that's pretty empowering, and that's not to say that the other people in your, in your life, didn't play a role in the problems, you know. And again, I am projecting here probably, but, but I think, you know, I think once we take ownership of our situation, whether it's in a marriage or our financial situation, whatever it is That's actually liberating. That may sound like, oh that's painful. It is painful. But you know it may sound like that's a lot of work and it's all — that I have to accept that responsibility, but it's actually freeing because, oh no. Now I have a lot more control of how my life is going to be in the future. So anything to add there.

Speaker 2

42:33

 Yeah well that's right. It was a stepping point for me and it was just it was something that is needed to happen really all for things to change. So yeah, that was pretty much what it had to be. It had four different Future something you know some different choices had to be made. Gotcha.

Speaker 1

43:01

 I am going to fire off some Ians will try to get through, and then we will wrap it up. What do people misunderstand about you?

Speaker 2

43:13

 That's very good one, I think, in the past, a lot of things, a lot of things have been misunderstood because I have haven't been a great communicator in the, in the past. So that's something that's been a big part of my personal development Journey, so I am not sure if that answers your question but that's good. I think most of the experiences. And we're based around in Miss. miscommunication or not enough, not enough communication my part. It's good.

Speaker 1

43:59

 So, you probably touched on already but if you could go back and give yourself some advice, your 18 year old self some advice, what would.

Speaker 2

44:08

 That be? Yeah, I think it would just be Having a better Outlook being better at look having a better mindset when these when challenges come up and also having that awareness of myself and I communication and my ACT, my actions that I take and the impact those actions on other people around me. Got it. That's good. Yeah, it's a greater way and its really.

Speaker 1

44:49

 So and piggybacking on that now for men or women in anyone who's listening to this who finds himself in a similar situation. Can you think of anything that maybe they don't aren't going to be going through a massive transformation, you know, but what are does anything to come to mind? What are some practical things that someone can do to try to get to that awareness or Better communication or, you know, I guess rephrasing it looking back over the last two years of your own life. What are some practical things that you have done? That have really helped get you where you are.

Speaker 2

45:30

 Today. Yeah, thanks. Daily routine is really important. So there's a lot of probably Paul habits that I got into and once I was able to shift that and get to the point where, you know, I was able to find that balance of you know, getting myself which like for everybody it's different what works then but what myself now is exercise involved in every day there's this meditation involved like every morning and just getting really clear on my intentions intentions for the day and what What's all this energy? You know, I want to put out, put out those. Yeah, I think for me, yeah, that's been a big, big part of Bowl being able to sort of transform and improve myself even things like, A lie. I performance planner actually that my daughter you have heard of Brendon burchard. Yeah but he has a high-performance planner, and he asked yourself. They certain questions, these questions in the morning, every morning, when you get up a lot about, how can I serve, you know, how can I serve others around me? How can I be my best economic, my best self and then at the end of the day, you also ask yourself a series of questions which is basically evaluated evaluating yourself and where you could, you know where you can improve and get better. So just ask I myself those kind of questions as well as been really has been really powerful in, you know, in being able to just realize where, you know where you are and where you'd like to make improvements against it. Yeah, that's.

Speaker 1

47:54

 Really good. And I think and I have read his the one book that has probably his most popular book but it's easy to say that. And I don't mean that like, oh, I just mean it's easy to say, oh yeah, I should be more intentional, but I think you need most, people need that some kind of structure, like you're talking about morning and night to actually Implement. You know, that intentionality is what you're talking about. You're taking control of your day, each day, which means you're taking control of your life, doesn't mean you can control everything of course, but you're being more intentional about your mindset and the energy you're putting out. But you're disciplined about it, I think it sounds like you can't just say yeah I am going to be more intentional, it just doesn't work. Yeah.

Speaker 2

48:46

 Because what tends to happen is people more reactive, right? So exactly quite often. Yeah that people will get up in the morning, and they will check their phone although check the emails and things like that. And that's all about, you know. Coming in like that, you're receiving. Yeah, and a lot of people, you know if they just sort of roll out of bed and sort of, you know, don't really have a lot of time and then there's straight out the door to work. Yeah, you're not setting. They're not setting specific intentions every day, right there. Just Sort of stuck in that daily routine. I guess this is doing what they need to do. Yeah.

Speaker 1

49:35

 Yeah I was on a mastermind Khalid join a mastermind group and finally, and yesterday and the guy was talking about 25 year plans, and then he and his business partner actually working on a 100-year plan, which his business partners, I think 68 or something. So it obviously Has more to do with their legacy and their family and things and people Beyond themselves. But I am just like, I was just like, I barely I mean, I don't have anything like that, I am honest. So, you know, and just the element of taking this the time and the space to plan and be intentional is important. So as we start to wrap up here, a fire off some more questions, if you were given 10 million dollars tomorrow, what would you do?

Speaker 2

50:25

 Do with it. Let us move question. 10 million dollars. I think that's probably upgrade my car. I would pay off. Pay off a property off my property. And I think the rest would just be around like getting setting things up so that you know, my family and leaving that Legacy or my family and my kids and things like that, you know, so that they can also Have a bit of a. I have been helping hand like this. Yes. And so it's probably best probably invest if a fair percentage of it laughter, I, you know, bought those couple things that maybe, you know, it was made my, my, my life, a little bit easier and whatever was left over. I would sort of invests best. Most of that, for the future.

Speaker 1

51:36

 Makes sense. You have already Mentioned the one book, Brendon burchard book. What's the book? Another book you could recommend to my.

Speaker 2

51:45

 Audience. So on this is the one, I think it's cold. It's called high performance plan. That's actually more of a more like a journal. Yeah, look at you don't talk to you.

Speaker 1

52:06

 Great. He does have a book that goes a long.

Speaker 2

52:09

 Way. Yeah, I have read that as well. Let us give me quite a few books to be honest. I have been renovating look business type of lately.

Speaker 1

52:22

 Any harm I know I am putting you on.

Speaker 2

52:24

 This one called business for life which is actually written by a guy called Matt alderton, which I am guessing. He's business person actually here in Australia. So your viewers may not you know, may not have heard of him, but he is the AC after being successfully quite a few businesses himself. He now runs like a business networking, networking type organization which I am involved in and this book. Or simply just goes through a lot of different really handy. Things around business, everything from like getting clear on your values and your action and vision statement, you know, branding marketing. Pretty much, you know a lot of the love. The main things that you need in business to succeed. I do. Yeah, that's best. If that's been Something that's been really good.

Speaker 1

53:41

 It's good because it yeah, I don't I hadn't heard of him so.

Speaker 2

53:45

 That I it's called BX X networking, I think and I think you guys actually have a hover over there as well because he's now gone like, he's networking groups are in our in New Zealand and that only just opened up some different branches. I believe in States, I am not Exactly. What the locations are. But yeah. So.

Speaker 1

54:14

 Okay, What's one question you wish I would ask but I haven't, I haven't asked.

Speaker 2

54:25

 I think we have covered everything pretty well to be honest. The only other thing is just it, just sprung to mind actually is when you were asking about. What advice would I give to myself? Or you know that might help. I help other people, right. And there's one other thing that I will just sort of come back to the that's just fun to mind and that is when we go through these major.

Speaker 1

54:56

 Anson make the.

Speaker 2

54:58

 Major life transitions. I guess you would say is to give yourself, you know, the time and space to process everything quite often, you know, because we're so f****** the situation ourselves. You know, we can make decisions based on our emotions at that on. And, so I think that's really important as well is just give yourself that time and that space to actually process. And really think about your before you take action on anything really think about You know what's in line with your own values and what the, what the outcomes, what the outcomes may be. Yeah, so I think that's really useful as well.

Speaker 1

56:01

 Yeah, that is good. And that. Yeah, of course, that could be a an hour or a day or a month or a year. Could look very differently depending on the situation. But yeah, I think we have all found ourselves. Ourselves in that situation where we just react based on emotions. And I mean, that's not to say, emotions are bad, right? But yeah, you do need to create the space and create space and time and to be able to make a smart decision or not. The make a reflective decision, not a reflexive decision, I guess to bring it back. But.

Speaker 2

56:47

 Thing to add there. Yeah, we definitely, we definitely just need to give that time that spice I think definitely just too. Yeah, it is to get really clear and Be able to reset of resetting it you know get clear on what you want your goals what you ain't goals are?

Speaker 1

57:13

  so I got one more before we talk about where our listeners can reach out to you. What's has anything been surprising? What's been one or two Surprises with regard to your new profession whether that's about starting a business in general or being a counselor. What's something that you didn't expect? That's turned out differently. I think it's.

Speaker 2

57:43

 Just myself. I have never been in ever, been in business before and I think, for me, it's been a big. It's been so much learning and so much growing and so much pushing myself outside of my comfort zone, you know, to which things forward. But I think it's just that realization that the business is made up of so many different elements. And you have to be good, you have to be good at all of these elements for it, to be, for it to be successful, you know, like especially these days with all the technology, social media, and marketing, and all those kinds of things, you can be good at what you do, but if you're not good at finances and mindset and you know, social Real media and all these other things. You know, you need to be confident and capable at all of these. All of these things to be successful in business. So for me, it's just been a huge learning curve and I feel like I have learnt so much already, but I have still got so much to learn. So, yeah.

Speaker 1

59:12

 Now, that's great. That's I can relate to that. There's a lot to juggle. Many hats to wear so. Well, Marcus, I really do appreciate you coming on. I know it's early over there and I appreciate you getting vulnerable for our listeners and where can our listeners reach out to you?

Speaker 2

59:39

 Yeah. Thanks for having me all day miso. At least you listen. This can contact me at my website which is www.thegolfdoctor.com.au. Net dots a you Can I have the Facebook business page, which is also, which is ready to heal, counseling, got it. And there's actually a lot of different events and guest interviews, and things like that I have on my business page as well. And I also have a private group, okay? Well men for men as well, which is called Next Level, which is actually called Next Level Brotherhood, which is also, which is within Facebook and yeah, we do. We try to get a trunk give us as much of trade free value, as I can with different hints and tips around anxiety and stress. And you know, some of those daily struggles that people might be experiencing yeah. So yeah, it is. A lot of free and you do any value there. So yeah, check feel free to check that out.

Speaker 1

01:01:08

 Perfect. And you do virtual counseling as well?

Speaker 2

01:01:14

 Yeah. And I do. So I do, I can go counseling via by zoom and as we said before, I mainly specialize, Helping men through major life transitions. So, yeah. I have a complementary complimentary chat that we can have where we can have a chat about where you, what your current situation. And the current challenges might be, we can get some clarity around, your goals, and your purpose. Yeah. And what you'd like to gain From counseling. And then we can look at some different options. Moving forward.

Speaker 1

01:02:02

 Gotcha. Well, this has been very good Marcus a yesterday. I saw somebody advertising as a, she said, she's a life, a life coach. And I mean, I know I am getting this is the old man speaking here, but it's, I mean, this, the picture she looked like she was 18 years old and that's not me. Life coaches. I am just saying. I think it helps that, you know, unfortunately you have been through these big-time challenges and but that adds to The credibility your credibility and your you know you have been through these experiences so you can speak firsthand to you know to particularly men with regard to what they may be facing. So you know you strike me as a very real honest. Genuine person and You know, just again, thank you for coming on and I wish you the best with your business and yeah. Thanks a lot for your time Marcus. Appreciate.

Speaker 2

01:03:11

 It. Okay. So yeah thanks for having me. Danny.

Speaker 1

01:03:14

 Absolutely. And to our listeners out there please give us a positive rating and review and thank you for your time as well which is your most valuable resource. Thanks everyone. Thanks so much for tuning in to this episode of the form adversity to abundance podcast. If you're enjoying the.

Speaker 2

01:03:31

 Show, please feel free to rate, subscribe and leave a review.

Speaker 1

01:03:35

 Wherever you listen to your podcast that helps others find the show, and we greatly appreciate.

Speaker 2

01:03:39

 It. Thanks again for listening, and we will catch you in the next episode.